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Thursday, 29 October 2020

Fixing a story !!!

 Hey Sushi fam and welcome to my blog,

We are learning about surface features surface features are little bits that fix your story like punctuation, spelling and repeated words. Make it easier for other people to read.

Here is my example of my sentence without surface features.thissentsaChulymakessen Zbuttisrellyhrd to reed

so that is why surface features are important

On our Room Nine site and make a copy of a writing document and it had someones amazing story without surface features so we fixed the story  and now it makes sense. Here is the writing I changed 


He kept absolutely still as the footsteps got louder. He tried not to suffocate as  laid
under the bed he was wondering what had happened to his brother and his family. The man with the knife
in his hand stormed around the house.

 Mum has had boyfriends before but we had not thought that they would ever find us.
 Maybe he was one of them looking for revenge. But why would he come? Mum w ould just move and how did he find us? We live on the other side of the planet from where all of mum's boyfriends
 were so how could he find us? He might have put a tracker on mum when he last saw her or on one of her devices
 ‘Hello, where are you?
I know you're here, you're going to tell me where your mother is or you shall join your father... in the skies. So  which will it  be death or freedom you have ten seconds to choose wisely’.’'


Thank you for reading my blog please leave a comment do you know how to surface features know?

1 comment:

  1. Hello Ellenessa.
    It's great to see that you have made a start at highlighting your learning.I can't wait to see the rest once it's completed.

    ReplyDelete

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